初中英语课前三分钟笑话演讲稿
It's was little Harry's first visit to the country,
这是小哈利第一次停留在乡下，
and feeding the chickens fascinated him.
并且喂食吸引他目光的小鸡。
Late one evening he caught his first glimpse of peacock strutting in the yard,
有一天晚上，他第一次看到孔雀在院子里神气十足地昂首阔步，
feathers spread beautifully in all its glory.
得意地将羽毛很优美地向外展开,
Rushing indoors excitedly,Harry called out for his grandma.
小哈利很兴裔地，向屋内冲，大声叫他的奶奶来看……
"Oh,Granny,come see!Come see!" he exclaimed.
他高声地叫说：“喔，奶奶，快来看!快来看!”
"one of your chickens is in bloom!"
“你们家有一只鸡开花罗!”
A new business was opening and one of the owner's friends wanted to send him flowers for the occasion.
有一家公司开幕，老板的其中一位朋友为了这件太事要送他花。
They arrived at the new business site and the owner read the card,
他们到达了新的公司地点，老板读了卡片的内容：
"Rest in Place."
“安息吧”。
The owner was angry and called the florist to complain.
老板非常生气就打电话给花店抱怨。
After he had told the florist of the obvious mitake 就在他告诉花店这项明显的错误，
and how angry he was ,
以及他有多么生气之后，
the florist replied,
花庙却回答说：
"Sir,I am really sorry for the mistake,
“先生，我真的对于这项错误感到十分抱歉，
but rather than getting angry,
但是与其生气，
you should imagine this :
你还不如应当想象
somewhere there is a funeral taking place today,以下这个情况：今天有一个地方在举行葬礼，
and they have flowers with a note saying,
他们收到了花，还附上一张纸条说：
‘Congratulations on your new location' "
‘恭喜新居落成!”’
A man went to the doctor complaining of insomnia.
有一个男的去看医生，诉说着失眠的苦恼。
The doctor gave him a thorough examination,医生给他做了一次完整的检查，
found absolutely nothing physically wrong with him,完全找不到他身体有任何毛病，
and then told him,
然后告诉他;
"Listen,if you ever expect to cure your insomnia,you just have to stop taking your troubles to bed with you."
“你听好，如果你希望治疗好你的失眠，你就必须停止把你的烦恼跟着你带上床。”
"I know" said the man, "but I can't.My wife refuses to sleep alone."
这个男的说：“我知道呀，但是我没办法呀，我老婆不肯一个人睡嘛!”
Johnny had been misbehaving and was sent to his room .
强尼因为不乖就被赶进他的房间。
After a while emerged and informed his mother that he had thought over and then said a prayer .
过了一会儿。他就出来跟他的妈妈说他已缓!彻底反省，而且事后祷告了。
"Fine",said the pleased mother.
满心欢喜的妈妈说：“很好，
"If you ask God to help you not misbehave,He will help you."
如果你求上帝帮勘你不要不乖，她就会帮助你。”
"Oh,I didn't ask Him to help me not misbehave,"said Johnny.
强尼说："哦，我没有求她帮助我不要不乖;
"I asked him to help you put up with me."
我求它帮助你来忍受我。”
感谢您的阅读，祝您生活愉快。
