还不懂。
这不懂，让我失去你
我曾经爱你，百转千回。
我曾经希望陪你，天涯海角。
我曾经铭记你是我的唯一，此生不换。
是什么，让你的离开，这样沉默？曾经，曾经，只有曾经。
我能说的，只能是曾经。
曾经，那么重要的人，曾经那么在乎的人，你在哪里？你是否还听得见一个人的哭泣？你是否能听到他的心在撕裂？曾经，那么，那么的在乎。
曾经，那么那么的舍不得。
是什么，让你转身离开？曾经，我只记得你。
现在，我渐渐学会了谁也不在乎；现在，我渐渐学会了一个人；现在，我学会了没有你，学会了爱上孤独，即使它让我伤痛。
那一幕，我好想，牵你的手，真的，好想，好想。
那一天，我好想好想告诉你，我是真的在乎你。
那一刻，我好想，好想，拉住你，还是想挽回你。
可是，走了。
你，走了。
走了，是真的。
不曾，从来不曾，回过头。
哪怕一次，只是一次，都没有。
即便是一眼，请给我，给我那一秒的，只是一秒的回忆，这样都不可以吗？
离开之后，我在忘记。
是的，做到了。
我做到了。
我是真的忘了你了，因为，你不可能，不可能会记得我。
忘记你，那之后，我就学会了孤独，因为，你，不在了。
你消失了，永远的，在我的世界里。
我学会了孤独，我学会了一个人。
然后，我习惯了，以为那是我的本性。
我一个人吃饭，一个人上厕所，一个人逛街，一个人买衣服，一个人发呆。
一切，都是我一个人。
我学会了拒绝，拒绝一切，所以再没有人走进过我的世界。
我笑，大笑，开心地笑，笑着孤独地生活。
我会去逗所谓表面老实的人，即使被说成是挑逗，即使被说成是调戏。
我，无所谓。
我不和任何人深交，可是却依然会去调逗他们。
问我为什么，我说，不为什么。
我，只知道，你离开了。
曾经，我以为世界上最伤的事不过是你爱的人恨你。
你离开之后，我明白了。
不是，真的不是。
如果他恨你，至少他还记得你，至少不是陌生人。
你离开之后，我才明白：原来，能够成为仇人，也是需要缘分的；能够成为仇人，也是一种幸福。
而世界上最伤的事竟然是，陌生。
不是恨，而是连恨也没有，什么都没有，一切的一切，都不存在。
被当成透明的，这种伤害绝对超过了自有人类以来的任何一种刑罚。
这是怎样的一种惨痛啊，你不费一兵一卒，不花一言一语，不用一丝一点，什么都不用，就可以把我伤得这么的淋漓尽致，就可以让我如此的痛彻心扉……
如果可以，我真的希望我们不曾相遇；如果可以，我真的希望我们可以从一开始就只是陌生人。
从陌生到熟悉再到陌生，这其间的伤痛令人无法想象。
我想知道：当你决定把我当成透明的时候，你痛了吗？哪怕一点点。
当你从我身边走过时，那陌生的一切，你是怎么做到的？你有没有难过过？
生命中，你走过了。
好想挽留，却发现，我失去了资格。
是从什么时候开始，我对你来说成了连陌生人都不是的透明人？在这个世界上，或许我对无数无数的人都是陌生人，但只有对你，唯独是对你，我是透明的。
我做错了什么吗？我真的有做错吗？多年以后，我明白了，因为我不懂要怎么样来爱你。
也许，当初不靠近你就是爱你。
如果是这样，或许，至少我对你不会是透明人，至少，我们会是熟人。
是我的贪婪，让我失去你了。
是我太贪心了，我想在你心里的位置能和你在我心里的位置一样。
是我忘了，世上没有公平的事。
感情里，更不存在，等价交换。
而我，那时候，还不懂。
这不懂，让我失去你了。
Also don't understand. It's not understand, let I lose you
Once I love you, BaiZhuanQianHui. I had hoped to accompany you, faraway places. Once I remember you is my only, not in this lifetime. Is what, let you leave, so silent? Once, once, only once. I can say, is only once.
Once, so important person, once so care, where are you? Are you still hear a person cry? If you can hear his heart in the rent? Once, so, so care. Once, so then to want. Is what, let you turn away? Once, I only remember you.
Now, I gradually learned who also don't care; Now, I gradually learned to a person, solveI learned to have no you, learn to fall in love with alone, even if it makes me pain.
The scene, I really want to, to hold hands, really, really, really want to, and I want to. That day, I really want to really want to tell you, I really CARES about you.
At that moment, I really want to, and I want to, took you, or trying to save you.
But, go. You, go. Go, is true. Never, never, looking back. Even if a, just once, all have no. Even if one eye, please give me, give me that one second, just a SEC memories, so that all may not?
When I leave, I forget. Yes, do it. I did it. I'm really forget you, because you can't, not may remember me. Forget you, after that, I have learned how to lonely, because you, not. You disappear, forever, in my world.
I learned to alone, I learned to a person. And then, I used to think that is my nature. I'm a people eat, a person the toilet, a person go shopping, a people buy clothes, a person in a daze. All, all is me. I learned to refuse, refused to everything, so no one came into my world. I smile, laugh, smiling, smiling live alone. I'll go to make so-called surface the person of honesty, even if is said to be provocative, even if is said to be flirt. I, it doesn't matter. I'm not a anyone, but will still go to the tease them. Ask me why, I said, why not.
I only know, you left.
Once, I thought of the world's most hurt thing but is the person you love to hate you. After you left, I understand. No, not really. If he hates you, at least he still remember you, at
least not strangers. After you left, I just understand: originally, can become an enemy, is also need lot; To be an enemy, is also a kind of happiness. And the world's most hurt thing unexpectedly is, unfamiliar. Not hate, but even hate also have no, nothing, all of all, don't exist. Be as transparent, this kind of injury absolutely more than any since the dawn of a kind of punishment. This is what kind of painful ah, you don't FeiYiBing a jailer, don't spend every language, not a point, what all need not, I hurt so incisively and v ividly, can let me so enough trails......
If you can, I really hope that we never encounter; If you can, I really hope we can from the start, just a stranger. From a strange to the familiar to strange, meanwhile the pain is can't imagine.
I want to know when you decided to have me as transparent, you pain? Even if a little. When you walked by me on, the strange all, how did you do it? Have you sad?
In life, you to walk through. I want to keep, but found that I lost my qualifications. From what time to start, I to you became even stranger is not advertisements of? In this world, perhaps I to countless thousands of people were strangers, but only to you, but is for you, I am transparent. I do something wrong? I really have done wrong? Years later, I understand, because I don't know how to love you. Perhaps, had not close to you is love you. If so, perhaps, at least I to you not advertisements is, at least, we would be acquaintances. Is my greed, let me lose you. Is I want too much, I think in your heart the position can and you are in my heart position. Is I forget, there is no justice. A relationship, more do not exist, equivalent to exchange. And I, and in that time, also don't understand. It's not understand, let me lose you.。
