2013年浙江高考英语作文精讲精练
【原题回放】
【2013浙江卷】
请以“One Thing I’m Proud of”为题，用英语写一篇100~120个词的短文，记述一件你自己认为得意的事情。要求如下：
1.记述事情的经过；
2.简要说明你感到得意的原因或从中得到的启示。
注意：文章的标题已给出，不计入词数。
【参考范文】
One Thing I’m Proud of
I still remember how I became a good table tennis player.
The first day I went to high school, I saw some of my classmates playing table tennis. Amazed at how skillful they were, I was determined to be just as good. Later on, I often watched them carefully to learn their techniques. Then I kept practicing until I became confident enough to challenge the good players. At the end of the term I became one of the best players in my class.
I am really proud of this experience, because it helps me realize that we all can fulfill our potential and achieve our goals through hard work. It also helps me better understand the proverb "Practice makes perfect.”
【亮点说明】
本篇书面表达要点全面，语言简练流畅，时态、人称和标点符号使用正确，很好的完成了写作任务。在作文中作者开门见山提出自己想要写的事情，然后详细记叙当时的情况。最后表明了自己对这件事的认识和想法。在文中作者使用的Later on, Then，At the end of等词汇清楚地表明了事情的发展过程，给人一种脉络清晰的感觉。此外文中高级词汇和短语fulfill our potential，achieve our goals和谚语“Practice makes perfect”的使用都成为了文章的亮点所在。
【品鉴与提升】
示例一
One thing I am proud of
Everyone has things which he is proud of, so do I.
Three years ago, it was a sunny day. Everything seemed to be in harmony. Suddenly, a terrible thing happened. A dog was running after a little boy. It suddenly hit me that the boy was in danger. I threw stones at the dog, but the dog wanted to bite me. Thanks to the passers-by, I was saved. After a while, the boy’s mother arrived and praise d me. She said gratefully that her son was okay just because of me.
I am proud of what I did. When I was determined to save the boy, I even ignored my safety. I won’t regret doing it.
修改一
One thing I am proud of
As is often the case, everyone has at least one thing that he is proud of. To be sure, I am no exception.
It was a sunny day three years ago. Everything seemed to be in harmony. Somewhat unexpectedly, a terrible thing happened. A boy was being chased by an aggressive Tibetan dog(被动), screaming in fear. It suddenly hit me that the boy was in danger. I threw stones at the dog, but the dog fought back against me! It was thanks to the passers-by that I was saved in time of emergency. After (what seemed 10 minutes), the boy’s mother arrived and thought highly of me. She said gratefully that her son couldn’t have been saved without my timely help(双否定).
I am proud of what I did. Determined to go to his rescue(分词), I even put my safety aside. By no means will I regret doing it despite my sufferings(倒装) .
示例二
One thing I am proud of
Where there is a will, there is a way. When I began to learn to cook, I failed many times. But in the end, what is cooked by me is very delicious, because I carried on with it.
The first dish is fried egg. It is difficult for me to control the temperature of oil. In order to learn it well, a great number of eggs were wasted. I never gave up so that I fried eggs better. Success calls for firmness.
The reason why I learned to cook is that my mother can rest after she finished her work. I am proud of cooking on my own. (Come straight to the point)
修改二
One thing I am proud of
Where there is a will, there is a way. It makes me proud to be able to cook delicious fried egg after a lot of hard struggles as follows.
Before I could cook tasty fried egg, I had failed many times. It is a hard nut for me to control the oil temperature. In order to get the trick of the trade, a great number of eggs were wasted. To make matters worse, once the hot oil splashed onto my face and I got a slight burn. A discouraging idea popped into my mind like a flash----I wanted to give up. However, I didn’t because I was fully aware that quitters can’t be winners and winners can’t be quitters. It takes perseverance to be a success!
The reason why I learn to cook is that I want my mother to have more rest after work. I am proud of myself for being able to do it after painstaking attempts.
【反思演练】
请挑选出以上文章中吸引你的词组与句子，并用在你的作文上，写一篇语言生动的作文。要严格按照题目要求作文，不要脱离题意。
参考词汇：skillful；fulfill our potential；achieve our goals；proverb；be in harmony；somewhat；aggressive；fought back against；timely help；put my safety aside；firmness；get the trick of；splashed；aware；painstaking attempts
参考句子：Amazed at how skillful they were…
As is often the case…
To be sure, I am no exception.
Somewhat unexpectedly…
She said gratefully that her son couldn’t have been saved without my timely help.
